Master Career Counselor

Our definition for networking must be the frame for this post:

It is the ability to become a small yet important part of a larger interconnected system of people from across one's community, industry or professional sphere to be a resource for others and access resources from others when needed based on mutual benefit and agreement.

In essence networking is a dance. It involves three important components:

1. Synchronicity
2. Timing
3. Intimacy

Without each of these three actions properly functioning at once, adjectives begin to emerge:

Networking is so awkward!
It is so uncomfortable.
It makes me feel so clumsy and ill at ease.

Imagine for a moment, the world of work is very much like the ancient rite of proper passage: attending and participating in a coutillion. First, you must RSVP properly. Next, you dress up for the occasion. Finally, you attend only to dance with partners you don't know. When my daughter attended this event in her eighth grade year, I picked her up a little early (on purpose). I walked in to a ballroom crowded with teenagers trying to find comfort in dancing with strangers. Yes, it was organized and supervised by adults who rotated the participants alphabetically so no one would be left out. However, when you slow dance with a stranger it is plain awkward. I saw this happen to my child.
When I found her in the crowd she was tolerating the last dance. It was a slow one where she had to dance close to someone she didn't know. It was interesting to watch as they tried to dance in synchronicity. They drew close for the dance but their heads were completely turned away from each other. How can you look into the eyes of complete stranger? Their uncomfortable stance was obvious body language of complete awkwardness.
Networking can be the same as a coutillion dance. Unless you've developed a fundamental relationship with the other person, it will always feel difficult to ask for what you need or to help another person when you haven't developed the relationship. Thus, we will continue to look at three imperative networking factors: synchronocity, timing and intimacy in future posts. Get ready to dance and look others in the eyes.

So many career professionals hate the "N" word. You know that ten letter word that makes one cringe at just the thought of it: networking.

The sanitary version of its definition is:

The act of working a room full of people to promote yourself or business that makes one feel like a type of car salesperson.

The gross version of its definition is:

The art of making small talk for no apparent reason with people you don't know or really care to know resulting in an awkward feeling of "what the heck am I doing here?" or "This is a complete waste of my time". I feel completely stupid doing it.

The reality version of its definition is:

Being a small yet important part of a larger interconnected system of people from across one's community, industry or professional sphere to be a resource for others and access resources from others when needed based on mutual benefit and agreement.

Having a network and being able to network are two different beasts. So first things first. What is your network? Who is a part of your network? What do you have to offer your network? Answering these three questions will prepare you for the next post. It is about the network dance. This is the movement necessary to enter into a relationship of synchronicity and collaboration with others. Do your homework, answer those questions and visit again soon.

Never before have I seen so much angst in my clients. It is the hardest time in the history of career development to be a private practicioner. People are losing jobs like crazy and express to me their feelings of fear, hurt and rejection. It appears that life is crumbling right before them. Losing a job can be one of the BIGGEST pills to swallow. Personally, I vote you spit it out.

Here is my advice to the many who are using kleenex a lot, feeling their souls have been ripped apart by a pink slip and don't know where to turn or what to do. This blog posting is for you.

1. DON'T PANIC. The worse possible strategy is to give up before you start. Yes it is a tight market. Yes, the outlook seems bleak. Yet, reality invites you to remember that jobs are out there but they will not come to your door. I have seen clients get new offers within a few weeks. Why? Because they had the guts and determination to do what they had to do. Offering yourself back to a market that seemingly just fired you is not an easy path. The longer you wait, the longer it takes.

2. UNDERSTAND YOUR LIMITS. The biggest limit on the current typical job-seeker is a bruised ego. I can't tell you how many people are successful in getting an interview but question their confidence and allow self-doubt to creep in. The absolute greatest devastation faced by most people is the loss of worth and value resulting in a tainted perception of their skills. This is the greatest poison of all.

3. UNDERSTAND YOUR POTENTIAL. If you will get past the anger, hurt and self-doubt I can tell you the statistical probability that you will be re-hired is greater than if you wallow in pity and depression. I think you should give your emotional responses (all normal) a deadline. Then, move on and face a new challenge. Two realities exist: 1. An employer out there needs you but doesn't know you exist or 2. You have a company inside you waiting to be born. Why not now?

4. BUILD A GREAT RESUME. This is the greatest tool for initial contact that results in a critical first impression. If you email me at careerspan@gmail.com between today, December 4 and Christmas, I will send you a template at no cost. The one used most often by my clients works extremely well because employers helped create it.

Finally, recognize what matters most in life isn't what an employer can take away.

As I always preach...employers can have your sweat, but never your blood. That belongs to people in your life that matter most. In the end, that is what counts.

Remarks made by President Obama on November 12, 2009:
"Over the past 10 months, we’ve taken a number of bold steps to break the back of this recession. We’ve worked to stabilize the financial system, revive lending to small businesses and families, and prevent responsible homeowners from losing their homes. And through the Recovery Act, we’ve cut taxes for middle class families, extended and increased unemployment insurance, and created and saved more than a million jobs.

As a result, the economy is now growing again for the first time in more than a year -- and faster than at any time in the past two years. But even though we’ve slowed the loss of jobs -- and today’s report on the continued decline in unemployment claims is a hopeful sign -- the economic growth that we’ve seen has not yet led to the job growth that we desperately need. As I’ve said from the start of this crisis, hiring often takes time to catch up to economic growth. And given the magnitude of the economic turmoil that we’ve experienced, employers are reluctant to hire.

Small businesses and large firms are demanding more of their employees, their increasing their hours, and adding temporary workers -- but these companies have not yet been willing to take the steps necessary to hire again. Meanwhile, millions of Americans -- our friends, our neighbors, our family members -- are desperately searching for jobs. This is one of the great challenges that remains in our economy -- a challenge that my administration is absolutely determined to meet.

We all know that there are limits to what government can and should do, even during such difficult times. But we have an obligation to consider every additional, responsible step that we can [take] to encourage and accelerate job creation in this country. And that’s why, in December, we’ll be holding a forum at the White House on jobs and economic growth. We’ll gather CEOs and small business owners, economists and financial experts, as well as representatives from labor unions and nonprofit groups, to talk about how we can work together to create jobs and get this economy moving again."

Since I'm not one of the small business owners invited to attend, here is my advice as a career counselor:

1. We are in such a dramatic technology revolution that has forever changed the way our world does business. This may likely result in a permanent loss of certain jobs (telephone operator,drafting technician,etc)that will not have significant growth again while paving the way for brand new ones (web designers, systems analysts,researchers etc). The steps needed for employers to start rehiring may likely NOT be their sole responsibility. The potential workforce may need a serious retool. All you have to do is ask a newspaper publisher if I'm right.
2. Re-tooling may mean reinventing America's idea of "career". Job security is not only dead but now fossilized. It may not be unheard of for most of the future workforce to be independent contractors that piece meal small jobs from a plethora of different opportunity sources.
3. The green collared workforce is not yet prepared for the potential of indefinite avenues of growth in biotechnology, food sciences (especially with animals) and the environmental push to reduce carbon footprints. We have barely scratched the surface of such a HUGE well of potential that demands a new type of worker that LOVES knowledge but is also completely comfortable working with gadgets and tools.
4. As a nation, we must re-brand, re-invent and reconsider our attitude of "vo-tech" jobs. Being a plumber, electrician, HVAC technician, or a mechanic have seriously been viewed as an educational safety net and option for the "less than smart" student. In reality, those jobs and workers who do them are the bread and butter of our economy. Ask any utility company about the future worker who will replace their older, aging linemen and they will scratch their heads in complete frustration and anxiety. The reason? Maybe we have overmarketed the college four year degree that is needed in only 15% of our economy. I am not discounting a college education. I am saying the associate degree, the vocational certificate and training needs equal footing in importance. Who is going to repair your broken air conditioner? Who will fix the power line downed by a winter storm?

I could go on, but that is all for now. Best wishes to all the experts converging in Washington. I hope that you remember a knowledge worker can use a wrench and hammer to ratchet our economy in a new direction of growth and opportunity.

The word, career has its root in the french word meaning "racetrack".
Makes perfect sense to me.

After all, sometimes our career feels like a race. Each morning, we start out of the gate with a sprint and reach our turns by mid-afternoon. We watch the clock and keep on track for when the day is done. Then, our race for the day is finished.

However, the word career implies so much more. It implies a race but a very long one. It implies speed, excellence and duration over time. We start a career when we begin to get paid for work. We end it when we die. The finish line comes only at the very last leg of the race.

So, how is your race going? Are you out of shape? On the wrong track? Left out in the barn? Are you sprinting with no end in sight? Are you pacing ready to crank it up to full throttle?

Career is really a word that means movement toward a destination around the bend. We can't predict exactly what is beyond it but we can prepare for it. Simple steps include:
1. Have your resume updated at least monthly.
2. Learn a new skill at least weekly (preferably related to technology).
3. Find a mentor in your field of expertise.
4. Take a colleague to lunch and brainstorm about what is likely to happen to your industry next.
5. Get plenty of rest. Every horse has a stall to take a breather and relax.

No better time than now to prepare for the future. After all, it starts tomorrow morning.

Serious questions are being asked today in the wake of the Ft. Hood shooting spree in which a gunman killed 12 and injured many. One of the zillions of questions to be asked and answered will be, "What event, circumstance or trigger would set-off such vile anger to carry out such a horrific act of unfathomable proportions?" This was an violent act against the very "family" he not only worked alongside but had sworn an oath to protect, guard and help. We will be grappling with this for months as the victims' families try to cope for decades. Violence, hostility and anger have dire consequences in any workplace if certain warning signs are not noticed, ignored when noticed or minimized for the sake of convenience, fear or retribution. As the events of Ft. Hood continue to unfold, it is not unlikely that some will indicate noticing subtle behavioral changes while others observed the same types of routinized actions of a man known to be typically kind and quiet. It is a reminder for everyone that workplace stress magnifies stress to enormous proportions. A military base would be at the height of such stress during a war with multiple deployments. In a sour economy that has increased stress no one is immune to stress even on a good day. Be aware and keep watch for behavioral changes in co-workers and colleagues that can't be overlooked or denied. My strong advice to you is to seek resources available to you should you notice it in co-workers or in yourself. Warning signs are a first line of protection that can't be ignored.

As a career counselor I always make sure clients understand the three time zones of career success. We actually live in all simultaneously:
1. The past.

This one creates the most toxic of outcomes if you're not careful. The past can be the greatest obstacle to achieving goals because it grabs us by the foot and holds us in a mire if we have made mistakes and experienced failure. This time zone demands that all of us implement a new frame when looking at what we perceive as failure. New definition for optimal growth: Failure is when I experience something and learn absolutely nothing from it. Regret and sorrow have to stay behind you.

2. The present.

This time zone taps into several of our essential motivators to work, live and love. It is the NOW of life never to be lived again. This zone demands energy, focus and a sense of purpose to help you overcome the past and to not be stalled in fear of the future. Optimal growth occurs when you play hard, laugh loud from the belly and think of yourself as part of a community. No matter how isolated you may feel at times, you are a part of something much greater than yourself. Go find it.

3. The future.

This time zone requires that you not be faint-hearted. It runs at full capacity when you do two things: A. Ask a lot of questions such as, "Where do I want to be in a year? How do I get there? What can bring meaning into my work? What leisure activity do I need to try? B. Get over or through or around the fear of where this zone might take you.

Life at full throttle means our sorrow for mistakes is in the past, our will to love and live is in the present and our brain power is engaged to think, "what do I intentionally want to do? in the future.

Apathy is not welcome in all three zones.